The Remedy of Books

I love pirate books. So when I got this book from my husband for Valentine's Day I was quite excited to read it. I knew it wasn't *exactly* a pirate book, but was hoping it would have a bit of pirate-like adventure and a lot of Daniel Handler's fantastic sense of humor. Unfortunately, it really didn't have either.

I realize that books written as Daniel Handler are not meant to be for the same audience as when he writes as Lemony Snicket, however, even taking that into consideration I really disliked this book and every character in it.

We Are Pirates is really two parallel stories. One is about Gwen, a teenager who wants to be in control of her own life; the other is about her father, a radio producer whose career has stagnated. Although the stories overlap, they don't really show any cohesive intertwining. One could easily cut out either story without the other changing at all. I think this disconnectedness doesn't help the book.

The plot of Gwen's story is that she decides, along with Errol, an old man who has Alzheimer's and a love of pirate stories, to run away from home, commandeer a ship and sail out into San Francisco Bay. To prove her dedication to her new pirate cause, she plans to attack other ships and take their supplies. She pulls a few other people into her plot and carries it out in a surprisingly bloody fashion, starting with the violent murder of two people.

Phil's story is basically circling around how much his career has stagnated, how he continues to screw up everything, and his very cringe-worthy relationship with his secretary--who he might want to sleep with.

There is a very strongly developed theme of powerlessness throughout the book. All the main characters (in fact, the secondary characters as well) are powerless in different ways--Gwen because she is a teenager and has no independence from her parents, Errol because he has lost his memory and cannot take care of himself, Phil because he doesn't understand why his career has gone downhill, and thus cannot fix it. Each character tries to take control of his or her situation in different  ways, but ultimately they screw things up even more. Of all the aspects of this book, this is the one I appreciate; it was well fleshed out and each person's struggle felt very real.

However, there was still no redemption or hope. I think if Handler had taken a different direction and actually had given the characters some success, or at least a moment of realization that there might be a different way to take control, it would have had some redeeming value. Stories do not have to have happy endings, but they should at least have some redeeming value to them. We Are Pirates was depressing throughout and ended on an even lower note. Gwen and her accomplices get away with murder, theft, and destruction (for which the most vulnerable of their group is blamed) and then life goes back to its mediocre hopelessness.

Beyond plot, I also have complaints about the writing itself. The narrator throughout the book is extremely unclear. There is some severe head hopping that is very disorienting to the reader. Sometimes this can be used as a technique to jar the reader into paying closer attention or to involve the reader in the chaos of a scene, but in this case it was merely annoying and made the story more difficult to follow. Another tactic that felt very gimmicky was that many times throughout the book the narrator refers to the story as if it were in the distant past, using phrases such as,"during this era of American history," and "at the time this story takes place." Yet, at the beginning of the book it seems the story is being told only a few weeks after the events happened.

While We Are Pirates wouldn't put me off reading Handler books in the future, I absolutely wouldn't recommend spending time reading this one unless you like selfish characters whose lives are on a downward spiral.

Yesterday, one of the world's greatest authors left this realm. His wit was only matched by his ability to delve deeply into the human soul and examine, laud, or poke fun at what he found there.
Rest in peace you wonderful man.

What better time, then, to bring out a few of my absolute favorite quotes?


Why do you go away? So that you can come back. So that you can see the place you came from with new eyes and extra colors. And the people there see you differently, too. Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving.
 - A Hat Full of Sky

Mister Teatime had a truly brilliant mind, but it was brilliant like a fractured mirror, all marvelous facets and rainbows but, ultimately, also something that was broken.
- Hogfather

In Ghat they believe in vampire watermelons, although folklore is silent about what they believe about vampire watermelons. Possibly they suck back.

Near Enemy is the second book in the Spademan series by Adam Sternbergh and was published earlier this year. I reviewed his first book, Shovel Ready, last year and enjoyed it despite it not being my usual genre. So, when I saw the second one available on Blogging for Books, I was happy to request it.

This plot follows close on the heels of the first book. A year has passed, but not much has happened and little explanation is needed to catch the reader up to the present. Spademan once again is the storyteller, relaying the plot in his minimalist narrative style.
The setting is still post-dirty-bomb New York City which is falling into ever deeper corruption and chaos. Wealthy residents lie shuttered away in high-rises and spend their days plugged in to an artificial reality called the Limnosphere while other try to earn enough to buy a few hours here and there to escape the harsh reality.

During a job where Spademan is hired to kill a lowlife "bed-hopper" named Lesser (who also happens to be a genius programmer), Spademan learns that Lesser might have discovered a valuable, and deadly, secret about the Limn. He decides not to kill him until he learns more, but soon Lesser disappears. Spademan is coerced into tracking him down by a member of the police who seems to have his own agenda and doesn't balk at using threats and force to get his way.
The story follows Spademan's search for Lesser and the gradual revelations that follow about the limn, the city's leadership, and even the group behind the bombing of the city.

Sternbergh has done a fabulous job crafting Spademan's character--his dry humor and pseudo-poetic observations of the crumbling world around him lend a definite depth to his anti-hero character.

The world, though again, not perfectly fleshed out (does anyone really believe the NYC would be given up for dead by the rest of the world?), was still very vivid and easy to visualize. I imagine the world looking very much like the one in the Fallout PC games (which I wish someone would make into a movie)--drab, run down, with occasional patches of normality the further you get from the cities.

Near Enemy was more expertly written than Shovel Ready in subtle but noticeable ways. The pacing of the plot was very well done--particularly the transitions between action scenes. The symbolism, though not subtle (to match the book's unsubtle narrator), was still clever.

I do wish there was a more satisfying ending to this book. While some parts of the plot are resolved in the end, much more is hinted at. Of course, it's part of a series, but in my opinion Sternbergh did a better job in Shovel Ready of bringing the book's main plot to an end while still leaving it clear that there is more to come.

All in all I really enjoyed reading this book and look forward to the next.

For more info and to buy the book, visit the Random House website.

I received this book from Blogging for Books for this review.

Blackbeard (Edward Teach) Let's face it, this isn't his scariest pose.

Happy 2015 to everyone! The holidays gave me a much-needed chance to sit down and finally finish reading this book. It's another one I received from Blogging for Books, though, unlike the last one, this is a bit more within the genres I generally enjoy.

I was intrigued by the description on the website which included a mention of Elizabeth Báthory. For those who have never heard of "The Blood Countess" she is said to have brutally tortured and killed hundreds of girls for her own inscrutable reasons (most likely because she was a complete nutter) in the late 1500s / early 1600s. She's one of history's most famous and most bloodthirsty female serial killers. I find her rather fascinating in a morbid way and was excited to see how the author, Rebecca Alexander, would weave her history into this novel.

The narrative switches back and forth between first-person narration in 1585 by Edward Kelly, assistant to Dr. John Dee, and a third-person narrative following the activities of Professor Felix Guichard and Jackdaw Hammond in 2013.

Both sets of people are finding their lives intertwined in somewhat magical activities that extend the "living" existence of the dead. Kelly and Dee are commissioned by the king of Poland to save his dying niece Elizabeth Bathory by whatever means they can, while hundreds of years later Guichard is aiding in the investigation of mysterious deaths of young girls, and Jackdaw is herself a formerly dead person now trying to save the life of another dying girl.

I really liked the idea behind this book. Showing how Bathory became a monster/murderer and linking it to present day events lent intrigue and depth to the story. However, the narratives didn't always mesh well. I would have liked to see a stronger link between them throughout rather than just passing mentions of John Dee and the final Bathory link solidifying at the end. The issue was that the narratives were basically two separate stories. It might have been a stronger novel if, as the present-day characters discovered things about Bathory or about the history of revenants, that Kelly's narrative revealed them at the same time.

Unfortunately, though I found the book interesting, it had what I feel are numerous flaws which detracted from my overall enjoyment of the book. The character development was rather flat and the romance was heavy-handed. A lot of interesting material was hinted at in both narratives but wasn't explored--making it feel like the plot was under-developed. And lastly, a half-cooked attempt to explain how supernatural events are possible was thrown in near the end which really should have been left out. I don't feel that readers need to be walked through how supernatural things are possible--that's the point of them being supernatural.
Ultimately, I felt the novel fell short of what it could have been.

I received this book from Blogging for Books for this review.

I am a big fan of The Princess Bride--it's been one of my family's favorite movies since we first watched it about 20 years ago. So, when I heard there was going to be a book about the making of the movie, I knew I had to read it.

Let me start with what I loved about this book.
I loved reading the anecdotes of things that happened on-set and learning details about what was going on before and after (and sometimes during) some of the most memorable scenes of the movie.

I loved that it wasn't just Cary Elwes' perspective but that there were snippets from others in the cast and crew interspersed throughout the book.

I loved hearing about what each actor was like off screen and how well everyone got on.

I loved the pictures, though I wish there were more "behind the scenes" shots rather than pics that looked like screenshots of the movie or were just the cast posing.

Okay, now for what I didn't love. Honestly, if I had to sum this book up in one word it would be "gushy."

Elwes makes it abundantly clear how much he admires Rob Reiner, William Goldman, et al. by sounding like an over-excited fanboy. I was barely a chapter in when I already wanted to shout at the book "WE KNOW! GET ON WITH IT!" but I carried on (Caryed on?) and hoped that it was just the intro of each cast/crew member that would be filled with gushing protestations of how amazing and talented he or she was. Alas, it was not to be. If you were to go through this book and cut out all but the initial praise of each person, I have no doubt that it would be 1/3 shorter. (taking out the phrase "just the nicest person you'd ever want to meet" alone would probably cut out a full page of the book)

It was a bit of a frustrating read in this respect, because I got the feeling from the writing that Cary Elwes genuinely admires the rest of the cast, loves their work, and is an all around humble guy--but I don't think it came off the way he intended.

The writing, in fact, was all around bad. The beginning chapters have tons of wooden recreated dialogue, and readers are walked through every.step.of.every.action. Lines like "I thanked him and bid him good night before hanging up." are just not necessary.

Then there was the the repetition. Not just the repetition of each person's praises, but of facts, feelings, and even events. It really does surprise me that the book was not developed and edited more professionally. Cary Elwes is an actor, not a writer, and that's fine--but he co-wrote the book with someone who IS a writer, and presumably they also had a separate editor. Did neither Joe Layden nor the editor realize that the writing was so repetitive and mediocre and the tone was so fawning?

I don't want to be too down on the book, because I love The Princess Bride and Cary Elwes, but I get so disappointed when something that could have been SO great ends up just being okay.

When I looked up other reviews on Amazon and Goodreads I saw most of the reviews are 4-5 stars (clearly they weren't rating the editing of the book) but I also noticed that a lot of the reviewers had listened to the audio book read by Cary Elwes. That might have made a difference in the tone and even the annoyance of the repetition but as a print book it came off as  mostly dead.

Generally I'm not a re-reader. I know some people have favorite books they read again and again and there are even some (somewhat obsessed) people like Christopher Lee who religiously re-read the same book every year (Lord of the Rings, for the record). It's not that I don't read some awesome books that are well worth re-reading, it's just that if I find myself with time to read, I'd rather embark on a new adventure than one I've already been on.
That said, I do have a few long-time favorites that I have read multiple times and enjoyed just as much each time. I think for someone who is generally not a re-reader, that says something about these books.

Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson
I first read this book as part of a Robert Louis Stevenson collection (which included his less-famous but still good Black Arrow) and though I liked it, I think my image of the book was heavily shaped by the various movie adaptations I'd seen (the best of which remains Muppet Treasure Island) and I didn't digest it as well as I could have. However, several years ago I re-read it in preparation to teach it to my high school class. I am convinced there is nothing so good as studying a book to help one to appreciate it like-new. Sitting down and examining to characters, their development, the plot flow, etc. all gave me a completely new view. I've since read it again, and likely will in the future. It is the quintessential pirate book (treasure, adventure on the high seas, mutiny, hostages, ghosts, gun fights, murder, maroonees!) and even more than 120 years later I think the story appeals to adventurous people of all ages.

The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis
When I was a very young child my dad read these books to me and my older brother. We got them from our church library one at a time, and he would read a couple chapters to us each night. Let me tell you, having to wait until the next day to find out what happens in the next chapter was both agonizing and fun. But I was too young to read them myself and imagining what might happen next was part of the fun. I don't think much of the stories themselves sunk in for long. They took on a specialness due to my dad's excitement as he read them, but I was left with good if fuzzy memories of the books.
It was many years later (I was probably 12 or 13) that I re-discovered the books. A friend gifted me with the whole set and I read through them in record time. They remain some of my favorite books and some of the easiest to re-read when I need something magical in my life.

Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones
Firstly, let's get the travesty that is Miyazaki's interpretation of this book out of the way. The movie took characters and elements from Jones' wonderful book, and, as much as I generally like Miyazaki I have to say, he completely ruined them.
Now the book on the other hand is one of my all-time favorites. I've both read it multiple times as well as listened to it brilliantly read by Jenny Sterlin (great Welsh accent) and enjoyed it just as much each time. Something about Diana Wynne Jones' writing makes me happy. Her stories always have a fun magical atmosphere and keep you reading--I usually finish her books quite quickly because I enjoy the worlds she creates so much that each time I pause my reading (for something mundane like going to bed, or going to work) I want to get back to them as soon as I can.

Dracula by Bram Stoker
I've read other writing by Bram Stoker and have to say that based on his other writing it almost seems that Dracula must have been written by someone else. The other books and stories are rather a mess. The biggest puzzle to me was The Lair of the White Worm which not only appears to have been written by someone with multiple personalities, but also while they were on drugs.
However he did it though, Stoker really struck gold with Dracula. One of the older vampire books (though not the first) Dracula is wonderful at making vampires not only scary but truly evil. Stoker's brilliant use of religious imagery corrupted and distorted into something evil makes for the creepiest and best vampire book I've ever read.

Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll

I think part of what makes Alice such a re-readable and beloved book is that you can get as much out of it as you like. If you read through quickly and focus on it as a story you get to adventure through some very strange places and meet some truly ridiculous characters. If you read through with a bit more concentration you get to appreciate Carroll's wordplay, puns, and wit. He was rather brilliant and liked to try out words in many different ways as he could. I definitely missed a lot the first time I read through it (I was rather young as well) and the second time I read it I realized how much he was playing with words and phrases linguistically.
The book is great for quotations as well...

"'Take some more tea,' the March Hare said to Alice, very earnestly.
'I've had nothing yet,' Alice replied in an offended tone, 'so I can't take more.'
'You mean you can't take less,' said the Hatter: 'It's very easy to take more than nothing.'"

I won a free copy of the audio book at the Brooklyn Book Fair this past September and am in the middle of listening to it. Jim Dale is very good as the narrator, but I do find his Cheshire Cat voice quite creepy.

Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett

This book is SO good. Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman are two of my favorite authors and are my hands-down favorite living authors. Each time I read this book it's just as funny as the first time. As with many books in which Pratchett has had a hand, there are so many cultural references and in-jokes you're sure to find new ones each time you read; I've had many "oh, that's what that's from!" moments.
It's currently being made into a radio play (due out this Christmas) and I couldn't be more pleased.